


Losing My Religion

by NinjaSpaz



Series: IwaOi Week 2020 [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Angst, Forbidden Love, IwaOi Week 2020 (Haikyuu!!), M/M, Nonlinear Narrative, Priest Oikawa, Prince Iwaizumi, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Sexual Content, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:08:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27885025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NinjaSpaz/pseuds/NinjaSpaz
Summary: Tooru devours Hajime in the dim sanctuary. Their lips move together in perfect sync, hungrily etching the memory of the other’s taste to their memory. Hajime tastes like him. He wonders if he tastes like Hajime. He wonders if anything will taste as sweet ever again.-Oikawa and Iwaizumi have one final tryst before the priest must marry the prince off to a foreign noble.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Series: IwaOi Week 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2035951
Comments: 16
Kudos: 64
Collections: IwaOi Week 2020





	Losing My Religion

**Author's Note:**

> Day 4: Weddings | Royalty | Forbidden Love | ~~Flowers~~
> 
> I'm sorry.

The prince stands at the altar, resplendent in a snowy white tunic. Embroidered cerulean ivy wraps around the cuffs of his sleeves and climbs up his arms, spreading across his broad shoulders. The laurels etched on his lapel bring out the green in his eyes. His typically wild hair is tamed with oils, slicking down the spikes his people loved to ruffle. Iwaizumi is beloved by all, and his wedding should be a joyous occasion for all. There are vibrant banners and streamers in his colors hanging from every column and rafter, his coat of arms proudly on display in the bright sunlight pouring through the windows.

For Oikawa, it is a somber affair, and the colors are muted to his eyes.

He clutches the holy book in his hands, fingers digging into the leather as he burns from within. His task weighs heavily on him, but presiding over the youngest prince’s wedding to a foreign royal is his duty, as both his spiritual advisor and his oldest friend. He straightens his priestly vestments as the organ sounds the symphony to his heartbreak.

The congregation stands, and every head turns towards the heavy, carved doors at the rear of the sanctuary. Every head but two. Oikawa watches the tightness in Iwaizumi’s gaze as he takes a deep breath, feels it pulling out of him as his eyes turn towards his future. Oikawa follows suit, but he slips into the past.

_The prince stands at the altar, hands clasped in prayer in the flickering candlelight. Tooru knew he would find him here, pulled to the sanctuary by the same invisible hand that twisted his own tortured soul with unholy desires. He doesn’t stir as Tooru comes to stand beside him, lacing his long fingers together and bowing his head before the leering altarpiece._

_“You should be resting for tomorrow,” he says softly, after offering a brief, unapologetic prayer to their god._

_Hajime sighs, dropping his hands to his sides and lifting his eyes to the mural on the back wall. “Couldn’t sleep.” Of course he couldn’t sleep. How could either of them sleep when the hours were slipping through their hands like grains of sand in an hourglass? “Figured you’d come.” Then, softer, “I prayed you’d come.”_

_Tooru fights to not reach out and take his hand. If he does, he’ll never be able to let go. “Looking for some final advice before you gallivant off with your lovely bride to her father’s kingdom?” He doesn’t mean to let venom lace his words. The prince is not at fault for his father’s political maneuvering._

_Hajime turns toward him, dark eyes poring into him, through him, straight to his heart. He is no happier about this than Tooru is. “What advice would you give?”_

_He has none. Nothing he has any right to say._ Call it off. Betray god and country and run away with me. Stay. _If it were so simple, they would already have fled. “Treasure every moment,” he says instead. “Learn to love her. I am certain she will come to love you, too.” How could she not? How could anyone not fall in love with Prince Iwaizumi Hajime? “She will fall in love with you and give you many heirs, you’ll see!”_

_His words are choked off as a large, calloused hand cups the side of his neck. “I don’t need heirs,” Hajime all but growls. Tooru can feel his pulse fluttering under Hajime’s fingers. “I only need you.”_

_“Hajime,” he whispers. The king would have him executed if he ever heard the prince’s name falling so sweetly from the holy man’s lips. He swallows, narrowing his gaze. “Is that an order, Your Highness?” He can pretend all he wants that it isn’t taboo if it’s a command._

_“If that’s what it takes,” Hajime grunts, pulling him down so that their lips are no longer separated._

_There is nothing pretend in the eagerness with which he parts his lips to drink all of Hajime that he can._

The melody of the march weaves through the rafters of the high, molded ceilings of the sanctuary as the doors open wide to admit the foreign princess. The Lady Kiyoko is truly radiant, the crystals woven in her bodice catching and reflecting the sun so that she appears to shine as she glides up the aisle. Her wide, layered skirt floats around her like a cloud, the ivory cape on her shoulders drifting behind her. Even Oikawa, deep in the throes of his inner turmoil, can’t help but be captivated by her beauty. As she takes her place next to her betrothed, he admits they make a stunning pair.

He clears his throat as the last note of the organ hovers in the air, steeling his nerves and proceeding as if this is just another wedding. Just a normal couple from the kingdom come to vow themselves to one another before their god and countrymen, and not the prince whose heart and body he knows as intimately as his own.

He begins the ceremony with gratitude, addressing the congregation of the prince’s subjects and thanking them for their presence at the auspicious event. He leads them through the traditional opening prayer and benedictions before directing those in the pews to be seated. The sanctuary is bursting to capacity, standing room only, and those who can sit down, do. He smiles at the betrothed royals and directs them to kneel.

_Hajime kneels at the altar, his hands on Tooru’s hips. Tooru tangles his hands in the soft spikes on his head as his prince, his liege, takes him fully into his mouth. He throws his head back, sighing at the feel of Hajime’s lips on him, the encompassing wet heat overwhelming his senses and making him delirious with need. The need to be touched, to be taken, to be filled with love in the way his occupation always promised but he’d never truly experienced. His body trembles with pleasure as he spills himself into his prince’s throat. Heaven is surely closed off to him now, but who needs heaven when he has this?_

Oikawa eulogizes the prince’s accomplishments and accolades, boasting his pride in his prince and giving voice to the love their people have for him before he goes away to spend the remainder of his life in another kingdom. He lauds the beauty of the foreign princess and sings her praises to the people, encouraging them to accept her and love her even though her marriage to their prince will take him away from them.

He speaks on unity, and the symbolism the affianced pair embody as they tie their rival nations together, forming a bond stronger than any before. He speaks on the unity of marriage in particular, and the joys and burdens associated within. He urges them to be patient and kind as they grow to know one another, promising that even though their union is not based in love, that it doesn’t forbid love from ever entering the equation. He encourages them to learn to love one another, to choose love despite their obligations to their nations. In spite of it. If their god could choose to love such wild children, surely they could also choose to love one another.

He segues into the ritual portion of the ceremony. A small bowl of ink sits on the pulpit behind him, and he dips his finer into it. He turns back to the royal pair and prays the traditional unity prayer, drawing the sign of their faith on their foreheads with the ink on his finger. It is a mark that will bind them together forever in the eyes of their god.

_Tooru devours Hajime in the dim sanctuary. Their lips move together in perfect sync, hungrily etching the memory of the other’s taste to their memory. Hajime tastes like him. He wonders if he tastes like Hajime. He wonders if anything will taste as sweet ever again. They move from lips to jaws to chests, teeth grazing and mouths bruising as they mark each other in places no one else will ever see. Tooru spares only a heartbeat to wonder how Hajime’s bride will react to seeing the marks on him when they consummate their union on their wedding night._

_A wicked surge of jealousy courses through him at the thought of another with their hands on Hajime and Tooru sucks a purpling claim over his prince’s heart. He knows he has no right to him, but he prays that his mark will sear itself to Hajime’s soul anyway. Hajime fervently leaves an identical brand on him, and Tooru knows he will bear it with him to hell._

Iwaizumi and Kiyoko rise to their feet, hands clasped as Oikawa recites another benediction, blessing the rings a young acolyte holds out for him. The bands are simple, made of a soft golden metal, polished to a gleam. Another symbol of unity, of love eternal and a promise of devotion. Oikawa offers one ring to the prince. Iwaizumi’s gaze lingers on his face, his expression unreadable as he holds on to the barest brush of their fingers for as long as possible. The sand is almost gone. This will be the last time.

The prince repeats the words the officiant tells him as he places the ring on his bride’s hand. She goes through the same process, though she retrieves his ring with significantly less unease, not giving Oikawa more than the barest minimum of acknowledgement. With both rings settled, and a heaviness in his heart he will carry to his grave, Oikawa announces the conclusion of the ceremony, with husband and wife becoming one with their first kiss.

_Hajime lays him bare beneath the vaulted ceilings of the sanctuary, kissing every inch of his skin as he opens him up and fills him. Tooru’s hands grasp at what they can reach, clinging to the prince and holding him close so that he can’t tell where he ends and Hajime begins. His body is on fire, every inch of him burning inside and out with desire, and he knows deep in his soul that this, this yearning and overwhelming love, this is the thing the elders speak of when they preach the love of their god._

_Tooru has never known this feeling outside of being with Hajime. He is supposed to be a man of faith, to devote his life to their god, but his only faith is in the salvation of his prince’s arms around him, the only life he has ever known is the one devoted to the prince surrounding him completely. It’s Hajime’s name that he cries as he is rent in two. It’s his name on Hajime’s tongue as they descend to hell one final time together, a final act of defiance against a world, a king, that would force them apart. As they reach their climax together, their voices ring out in the rafters._

The people sing as the newlyweds are introduced, their voices lifting up to the rafters in celebration and joy. Iwaizumi offers Kiyoko his arm. They depart down the aisle, Hajime’s cloak waving like a banner. A surrender. A farewell. He does not look back and Oikawa does not weep. He presses his hand over the bruise on his heart and prays. Not for forgiveness—he will repent for his actions but not his love, he will never regret loving Hajime—but for a future where they do not have to be apart. If not in this life, then maybe the next.

**Author's Note:**

> Please don't cancel me.
> 
> Kudos, comments, [tweets](https://twitter.com/anininjaspaz) are all welcome and appreciated! Day 5 we go back to fluff and canonverse! (Might go up late since I finished this one later than I intended.) See you soon!


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